Motivated Monkey

Smelly, nasty, disease infested feet? Well not to worry, the fish will eat it away….
 

There I was at the peak of my career. I had just won two Oscars, seven Golden Globes, a Grammy, my third NBA Championship as well as my fourth Finals MVP, the Martin Luther King award for heroism, received my fifth Pulitzer Prize, my third Nobel Prize and was Playboy’s Playmate of the Year, again. [...]

I keep my eyes on the ball, my feet shoulder width apart, knees
slightly bent, left arm held straight, firm grip on my Five Iron and
then I swing away at the driving range. It’s a good hit for a beginner,
I make it over 100 yards, then I look back down, and there’s another
ball already waiting for [...]

In our lifetime, the normal human being tends to accumulate more questions than answers. Some answers are simply not comprehensible to our feeble minds (Why are we here? Were my ancestors really monkeys? How the hell did she do that with her tongue?); while other questions we simply choose not to find the answers (Why [...]

Two weeks ago, a superior officer to myself assigned me the task of “Operation Homework.” It is a vital piece of the main mission objective for “Operation Graduation.” I was given this task at exactly 1600 Pacific Time two weeks ago from today and its completion is expected by tomorrow. Two minutes ago, I started [...]

10. They sell cigarettes and candies by the piece.
(A whole pack is waaaaaay too expensive for some)
 
 
9. You unplug the microwave when not in use to save money on your electric bill.
(That clock is really an unnecessary expense)
 
 
8. Braces on your teeth is a high class status symbol.
(It means you are rich enough to afford [...]