My Father is Addicted to Coke


It’s plagued our family for a long time. I’ve long resented my father for this and I’m sad to say that it has torn our family apart. What’s even more saddening is that he is still addicted to this day.

Oh by the way,  when I say Coke, I’m talking about the soda, the pop, the soft drink or whatever weird name you call this carbonated beverage. My dad is addicted to Coca-Cola!

I know it sounds stupid, but I swear it’s something that has annoyed me my whole life!

Now you say, there are millions of obese, overweight, fat, fast-food munching soda addicts everywhere. In fact, there are skinny, hot, sexy, healthy soda lovers out there too. So what make my dad’s addiction to soda so revolting to me?

Well let me break it down for you, my old man was in his mid-thirties, with six kids (yes six), hasn’t had a job in years and did not have a dime to his name. Yet, he would not sacrifice his daily soda for something more affordable, say like….. water!

To any middle class citizen, money for soda wouldn’t really be a huge financial loss to your monthly budget. It would be so minuscule that you probably don’t even think about it. What you need to understand is that the few dollars it costs to get a soda pop is a few dollars that my old man did not have! Add to this the fact that he needed it everyday, and I’m not exaggerating, he drank Coke for breakfast, lunch, dinner and everything in between.   

I wonder if he can get therapy for this? I can ust imagine his therapy session…

Therapist: “What’s the problem?”

Vince’s Dad: “I’m addicted to Coke…”

Therapist: “Well admitting you have a problem is the first step. I’m proud of you. So how often do you take it?”

Vince’s Dad: “Everyday… I have it for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I pretty much take a whole gallon of it everyday…”

Therapist: “Holy shit dude! You need help!”

Well, this is something I’m just going to have to accept. I need to get over it! Shocking as it may be, I have to try and look at the brighter side of things – at least he’s not addicted to Pepsi. 



15 Responses to “My Father is Addicted to Coke”